


We keep living anyway

by Sleepawaysora



Category: Spider-Man - All Media Types, Spider-Man - Fandom, Ultimate Spider-Man comics, spider-man homecoming
Genre: Angst, Avengers - Freeform, Medical Torture, Poor Peter Parker, SHIELD, Whump, but Tom Holland is still my Spidey, may is not the same in the mcu more based on ultimate comic may
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-20
Updated: 2018-10-26
Packaged: 2019-05-09 04:57:02
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,566
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14709492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sleepawaysora/pseuds/Sleepawaysora
Summary: Fury has no choice but to take Spider-Man out no matter what the cost





	1. Chapter 1

The moment Peter tells May that he is the “Spider-Man” his life spirals out of control. She has a heart attack after kicking him out of their home. Fury threatened to kill him in his front lawn. He manages to get away to visit May in the hospital. The memory of her disowning him broke his heart. He had no one else. She knew that. 

After climbing down from the wall to show her she just snapped. “Stop.” She said as if disgusted by Peter’s ability. He wanted her to accept him but she stared at him in dissatisfaction and annoyance. He hunched his shoulders “A-aunt May, I am sorry I just didn’t want to worry you.”

“I spent my whole life trying to raise you and all that has come from it is lies. You lied to me over and over again. I can’t do this with you I’m not your mother and your not my son. I don’t owe you that sort of patience. I want you out of here and out of my life.” 

Peter’s lip trembled “B-but to me you are my mom. And I love you.” Her eyes soften at his response. He was just a kid after all but loving him would only cause her pain. Her eyes hardened “I won’t do this with you.”

She became sick soon after that. He sat by her side while she was in the hospital although she wasn’t coherent. He just took her hand tears spilling from his eyes as he cried. “I love you so much. I want you to get better b-before they come for me.” Fury’s threat hadn’t subsided. He was relentless with taking Peter. All he needed was for May to wake up and renounce her guardian ship. Peter felt somewhere within him that she wouldn’t budge. But then again he knew she was angry. 

Fury who made it clear that Peter was an illegal genetic mutation who would be taken by SHIELD to do whatever they pleased. Once he turned eighteen of course. However the circumstances have changed. Peter was now too much of a liability with evil corporations wanting to get ahold of his DNA and use it for dangerous purposes. The idea of him living mundane was not safe.

Fury had gathered Steve and Tony to propose a way to apprehend Peter. Fury scoffed “I don’t need anyone to question my authority. Peter has too many enemies including potentially psychopathic biologists with some nut-bag plan to exploit his genes. I can’t have some kid running around with the answers to genetic engineering.” Steve nodded firmly “So we retrieve him tonight?” Fury mused “they’re a few things that we will have to do.”

Tony snorted “It couldn’t be that hard, to cut a grieving kid off guard then snatch him up.” 

Fury glared “Legally since he is a kid, I have no legitimate way to use brutal force against him. But I was able to convince the caseworkers his aunt is out of the picture for now. They said If she pulls through in the meantime we’d need her permission to keep him.” 

Steve stiffened “What exactly do you plan on doing with him?” 

Fury furrowed his brow “That is not something I need you nor Stark to worry about.” 

Tony crinkled his nose “I’m not worried about anything other than how time consuming this has all been. So when is he going to be alone?” 

“Visiting hours are over.” A nurse had entered the room with no sympathy in her tone. Peter sniffled “Just a minute.” He looked back at May then kissed her hand. Peter stood outside the hospital the cool breeze of night ruffling his hair. He wondered vaguely if he should patrol but he decided against it. His spider sense flared. He whirled around to see Fury with Iron Man and Captain America walking in unison. They had no problem intimidating Peter who stepped back attentively. 

Fury pulled out what appeared to be a taser. “You will be coming with us.” Peter’s eyes widened “You can’t use that we are in public!”Tony chuckled as he swiftly maneuvered around Fury to grab Peter. Peter didn’t take his eyes off the taser as it was brought to his side. Stark had Peter in an iron grip. Peter cried out when he felt a searing pain at his hip. He shook from the electricity soaring through his small frame. They used the time wisely with Peter disoriented so they haul him away. Once they boarded the plane Tony pulled out one of his latest inventions. 

He secured Peter’s hands and wrists then placed a collar on his neck. He then pulled out a remote. “This will keep him cooperative it’s strong enough to take you out Cap.”

Peter tested the cuffs they would not budge. “You can’t do this. I did nothing wrong.”

Steve ignored Peter then gestures to the remote. “Well we don’t know how much the kid could take so be a little easy on him.” 

Fury had a cell to place Peter in who had struggled the whole time. He managed to head butt Steve breaking his nose instantly. Then Tony set off Peter’s collar which had him seizing uncontrollably on the floor. Fury then had guards drag him in the cell. The plus side Peter mused was they had removed the cuffs. Peter began cradling one of his wrists he was sure it had been fractured. It had already began to swell. He eyed the three men wearily who had been watching him. They were having a discussion. Peter couldn’t hear them.

Fury exclaimed “Him being here isn’t going to prevent the inevitable. I already have S.H.I.E.L.D. begging me to let him be studied. I can’t control what they will do to him.”

Tony cocked his head to the side “I wouldn’t mind getting a blood sample.”

Steve rolled his eyes “Keep your sciences to yourself.”

Fury pinched the bridge of his nose “You guys don’t get it. This isn’t permanent.”

Tony looked up “What do you mean?”

“I have little to no options here. But I’m willing to see if we could reverse his DNA. If that doesn’t work he can’t stay.”

“Stay?” Steve crossed his arms.

“So I’ll have to put him down.”

Tony clenched his jaw. “I think that’s a bit extreme.”

Fury scoffed “I told you this isn’t up to either of you. But I’ll need you guys to help take him out if it comes to that. The kid isn’t weak he would go down fighting. You saw what he did to Steve.”

Peter began pacing around the room. He checked all possible routes of escape and not one appeared promising. His thoughts began racing as he wondered if May would be okay. He knew he had to be there for her. He was just hoping on everything blowing over then it could go back to normal. “Normal” Peter thought fondly as if that could ever happen.


	2. Chapter 2

Peter waited for hours for some sort of contact but got none. It was when he started kicking the ceiling vent. Fury barged into the room. “Sit down.” Peter eyed him then jumped to the ground. He didn’t sit but he did manage to get as far away from Fury as possible. 

“What?”

“You are going to follow me into the lab and we are going to try something. You will listen.” 

Peter raised an eyebrow “What will that do for me?”

“It will save your life.” 

Peter gawked at him “H-how?”

Fury motioned for Peter to follow him and by the looks of it Peter didn’t think it’d be a good time to resist. Entering the lab Peter noticed scientists gathering equipment. Peter being the nerd he is managed to look at some of the random chemicals lined up on a counter. Peter inspected one of the vials. He curiously twirled it between his fingers. Fury yelled “Put that down and don’t touch anything.” Peter glared then put it down. 

Peter didn’t see Steve enter the room but now he was aware of him as he guided him to a table. So they were prepared to force him if necessary Peter wasn’t surprised. Peter sat on the table and a scientist spoke in a monotone voice. “Roll up your sleeve.” Peter obeyed then groaned “I don’t know how this is going to-“ Peter then leaped off the table at the sight of the needle being held. 

“W-what’s that for?” 

Fury held the remote in his hand threatening to activate it. Steve stopped him then slowly approached Peter. “He is a child Nick. We can’t ignore that completely. He doesn’t understand, he scared.”

Peter scrunched up his nose “I’m not scared.” The crack in his voice was evident. Fury scoffed “Look kid, we are conducting a formula to remove your enhancements. This is one of fifty we don’t have much time to spare.”

Peter sat on the table eyeing the needle. “Sooo...your just gonna try them all out until it works?”

“Precisely.” Peter shook his head in frustration. “But what if it kills me?”

“It won’t.”

“How do you kn-.” Before Peter finished questioning the needle was quickly inserted spilling the liquid into his veins leaving a stinging sensation spreading through out his body. 

Peter looked at them feeling betrayed from Fury’s distraction. He started to shake and feel nauseous. Steve laid him down on the table before Peter could slip right off to the floor. Peter curled his legs in. 

“Just lay there until it passes then then we will compare your blood tests.”

Peter’s teeth were chattering “It hurts.” 

Steve stared at Peter pitying him. “It’s okay son just take deep breaths.”

Peter shuddered “H-how long is it going t-to last?” 

Fury shrugged “It’s the first trial so we’re not completely sure on that one.” 

Steve left the room shortly after Peter passed out. Tony approached him with a drink in his hand. “So how did it go?” 

“He complied but it wasn’t a picnic.”

Tony peaked in the room to see Peter’s trembling form. He takes a sip “So how many more to go?”

Steve grimaced “forty nine.”


	3. Chapter 3

Peter sat up on his stiff mattress clutching his throbbing head. He’d been worn out for the past day. There was no way he could keep doing this. He lost track on how many injections he’s had. This would kill him eventually. He cringed when he heard the door open. A visitor always meant pain. Fury stood in front of him “Let’s go Peter.”

Peter shook his head “I can’t.” Fury grunted “Yeah kid, this isn’t an invitation it’s an order. You’ve scared the usual entourage now I have to bring in the big guys“ Peter pleaded “There’s got to be another way.” Fury snorted “There isn’t.” He abruptly left the room. 

Peter eyed him in suspicion. His nose twitched at the sweet scent that invaded his nostrils. His head became heavy. He covered his mouth to avoid breathing in the knock out gas. His vision blurred from the lack of oxygen. He lost his battle with consciousness leaving himself to the darkness. 

His spider sense woke him up. Feeling the needle slide under his skin, making his breath hitch. Around him stood Ironman and Fury. They just stared at him. “What?” Peter said finally. Just speaking made him tremble. His stomach rolled bile rising up to his throat. He swallowed it, tears welling up in his eyes from the discomfort. Tony sighed “We are just seeing how many antidotes we can administer in one session.” 

Peter gulped not knowing how long he had been out then fearing the amount of drugs they put in him. “W-what do you mean?” A nurse checked Peter’s vitals. Fury’s phone buzzed, he pulled it out “You watch over this Stark. I got way more important shit to take care of then babysit.” He stormed out of the room. Peter felt the world around him shift. He whimpered. The nurse tutted “Well that’s no good.”

All Peter had time to register was the burning, searing pain in his chest. Tony watched as Peter eyes slipped closed. A few doctors came running in. “He started crashing.” The nurse informed them. “We should administer some fluids so we can flush this out of his system.” 

Tony jumped at Peter’s sudden gasp. His awake and terrified state put a bad taste in his mouth. Peter was wheezing “C-can’t breath.” His tear filled eyes watered with panic.

The nurse patted Tony’s arm. Tony stepped aside the nurse shook her head then ordered “Talk to him, if doesn’t calm down we can’t help him.” The nurse hushed Peter as he asked for help. Tony hesitated approaching Peter then with shaky hands pushed a few of Peter’s sweaty brown curls from his eyes. “We should of stopped at three doses. Fury doesn’t want to waste anymore time.” For some reason Tony thought if he explained himself to Peter he wouldn’t feel as bad. However all Peter could manage was a sharp inhale. 

For a moment Tony stared at Peter then their eyes met. Peter would probably never remember it but Tony will for the rest of his life. He saw the distinct spark of suffering behind scared tears and brown eyes. He let go then swiftly exited the room. This time Steve was awaiting him. Tony glanced at the coffee in his hands. “You got any liquor in there?” 

Steve shook his head then sighed “I’m guessing this isn’t going to work anymore.” Tony grimaced “There is no mercy doing it this way.” 

Fury approached them. He briefly exchanged looks with the two unsettled avengers. “This is the only option I have at giving him a life outside of his enhancements.” 

Tony crossed his arms “Yeah, well we can’t continue like this. He almost died in there, and none of the treatments have been working. Honestly we can’t rewire his system likes he’s some type of machine.” 

Fury pinched the bridge of his nose “Then what do you say we do put him out of his misery?” 

Steve and Tony couldn’t answer that, mainly because they knew that would be the easiest way out.


	4. Chapter 4

The morning May recovered she was visited by a man with an eye patch. With him, he had documents for May to sign. It regarded custody. Surrender Peter to SHIELD and he would be out of her hands. She began reading the pages. Peter would never see her again in accordance to the terms. At first she was appalled with giving him up but then again she made up her mind already. Before signing the contract she came across a page involving the word termination. 

“What do you mean by termination?” Fury cleared his throat. “In the event that Peter becomes a danger to himself or others he would be disposed of. You have to understand his mutation has made him a threat to society.” She stared at the ground lost in thought. Fury shifted uncomfortably for a moment he was hoping she wouldn’t read that part. 

“What are the odds of that occurring?” Fury couldn’t lie “I didn’t want it to come to this but it’s been considered and the off chance we can’t cure him well....we intend to go through with it.” 

“You can have my nephew but only if I can say goodbye. He doesn’t deserve to die feeling unloved.” Fury nodded “I can arrange that.” 

Tony almost spit up his drink “She is allowing this? She knows what your planing to do and she’s okay with this?” The news that Peter’s guardian agreed to the terms had made Tony’s limited faith in humanity crumble. He was betting on her not signing off her nephews fate. Steve was just as shocked “She wants to say goodbye? How could that make it any better?” 

Fury mused “It might help her cope if she regrets it in the future.” 

Peter spent the afternoon sleeping off his latest session. His heart pounded and he jolted awake when someone entered his room. It was Fury. “What I can’t have one break?” Fury grimaced “We have come to a decision.” Peter sat up “and what is that?” 

“We find that it would be merciful to stop the sessions.” Peter perked “Really?” Fury hummed “But we have to go through with terminating you.” Peter’s heart sank “Your going to kill me?” 

“My hands are tied kid, I can’t leave you the way you are.”

“B-but you said if I went through with the injections I’d be okay. I did everything you said!” Fury watched the news sink in. Peter was at first in denial then quickly that shifted to anger. He stood up “You put me here! You are doing this to me!” Fury stepped back and frowned “I didn’t intend to hurt you.” Fury opened the door to reveal a new guest. Peter’s sudden panic drifted away at May who appeared to be well. He couldn’t stop himself from wrapping his arms around her and sobbing into her shoulder. “I- I’m so sorry Aunt May, I never meant to hurt you or ruin our family. I just wanted to-“ May lightly let’s go of Peter, he rubs his eyes with his sleeve and sniffled. 

“Peter Parker, I have always loved you. And I always want the best for you.” Peter’s eyes shifted to Fury who was leaving the room then back at May. He was beginning to feel light headed. “I want to go home, I want to go back to school. I want everything-“ he hiccuped his throat began to close up. “Don’t cry honey. I’m sorry it had to be this way.”

“If we can go home, I s-swear I’ll never forget to take the trash out again. If we go home, I’ll make dinner every night.” He knew he sounded desperate for her forgiveness but that’s all he had left in him.

May just shook her head.

Peter’s breathing picked up and he couldn’t manage a coherent sentence. “They are gonna- they want too- I-I’m.” May hushed him “I know I’ve come to say goodbye.” She then hugged Peter and kissed his forehead. “I remember when you were just a baby. You were always so curious and full of love. I’m sorry your life has to be cut short maybe in the next one you’ll find peace.” 

Peter heaved, sobs wracking through his small frame. “Please don’t leave me.” May managed a fake smile “You’ll always be with me.” With that she left leaving Peter alone. He has never felt so alone or helpless in his entire life. 

Steve watched May exit the room. She frowned “Please, try to be gentle.” Tony rolled his eyes. “There’s nothing gentle about this.” Steve flashed Tony a glance “You ready?” 

Peter’s fight or flight immediately kicked in when Steve and Tony entered the room. He ran straight to the door, only to get pushed to the ground with a painful force. Steve held him firmly. Tony loomed over him. Peter’s words wouldn’t reach them as he pleaded “N-no let me go!” He thrashed under Steve’s grip. “Calm down, son.”

Peter used his legs to push Steve off of him. Tony activated his gauntlet to stun Peter. Peter all but weeps at the waves of pain. His body falling instantly. He rolled onto his side, his shaking arms managed to steady himself as he leaped off the floor. Steve grabbed Peter by his waist once again throwing Peter to the ground. Peter’s lip trembled “I don’t want to die. I’d never hurt anybody I swear!” Peter glared daggers at Steve. Who was preventing Peter from getting back up. “I-I won’t be Spider-Man anymore. I’ll be a normal kid. Please let me go. Don’t do this.” 

Tony finally spoke “We aren’t going to kill you kid.” 

Peter’s voice cracked “Where you taking me?” 

Steve kept his mouth shut as Tony offered Peter his hand. “We have one last injection we are going to try.” Peter tentatively grabbed it standing up. He was back in the lab again. The lights seemed to shine brighter than before. The cool air brought goosebumps to his pale skin. Peter squinted, he was brought to a gurney with restraints. “What are those for?” Tony exclaimed “Just in case you try to hurt yourself.” Peter snapped back “I think you guys already have that covered.” 

Peter slowly lowered himself on the gurney. Steve didn’t waste anytime he secured Peter then stepping back once assuring that he wasn’t going anywhere. Tony turned to him “It was the only way to get him to comply.” Peter began to struggle “W-wait please!” 

A few agents came in the room. Observing Peter’s meltdown. “I-I just wanted to be a hero! I wanted to save people and be like you guys.” Tony could already feel his regret sinking in. With the torment written all over Steve’s face Tony could bet he could feel it too.   
The weight of bringing this child to his death, will forever haunt them. 

Tony scowled when Fury made his way towards them. “You can’t back down now. I need you guys to do the right thing here. This may be difficult now but just think of all the damage that this boy could potentially cause.” 

An older gentlemen came in wearing a lab coat. His eyes were as cold as Peter felt. With him followed two nurses who were carrying what appeared to be various monitors. One of the nurses began to set up an ECG. Peter’s heart was pounding so hard. He didn’t need a device to tell him that. He couldn’t contain his fear no matter how hard he tried. Tony looked to see the other nurse pull out more equipment .The doctor spoke “What I have here is a pacing system it will speed up his heart.” He pulled a needle with a sheath connected to catheters with electrodes connected to the tips. “I will be placing this in his femoral artery. Then I’ll thread it through his body.” 

Peter whimpers “I don’t want to die.” The nurse begins to set up X-ray imagery for viewing the location of the catheters being strung throughout Peter. The doctor tore his eyes away from the nurse so they settled on Peter. “His clothes need to be removed.” Fury ignored Peter’s groan then pointed to a machine that was being brought in. “What’s that?” 

“This is an ablation machine. With it we will deliver little shocks to his heart. Now I’ll need to access that vein.” Tony grunted “What so you want us to take his clothes off? Why don’t you just shoot him in the head?”

Steve was mortified “Tony!”

“What’s wrong with fast and painless? You want to strip the kid of his dignity too?” 

Fury shook his head in disappointment then he muttered to Tony in a hushed tone. “They want to dissect him. They won’t be able to do it with a wound like that.” Peter didn’t know whether or not Fury knew of his advanced hearing, so keeping that information at a low frequency still didn’t prevent him from shuddering. 

Tony’s eyes widened in shock. He couldn’t believe this. Steve was just as uneasy. Still they both kept Peter steady as the nurses took his clothes off. 

Peter flailed when they removed his pants. The doctor inserted the needle near his groin, making Peter flinch. A nurse had attached the heart monitor. Immediately the sounds of Peter’s beating heart invaded the room and the minds surrounding each other. 

“Okay so this is a tricky part. I’ll need to be able to carefully string this through his body. We will move slowly but the boy needs to stay still.”

There was nothing about this procedure that felt comfortable. Once the needle was in, Peter could feel it pull through him. His veins were crammed with the catheters exploring him. It couldn’t of looked good either.

Steve went for the door but was stopped by Fury. “You don’t leave until it’s done.” It was painful to watch. The boy was trying to get calm himself, he was adjusting as much as he could. His breathing became heavier as he tried to control it. Steve couldn’t handle the sound of Peter’s terror. Tony began to pace around the room. 

“I’m going to flush the catheter with saline. The idea is to bring his temperature down, it will help slow down his heart. He will be too cold to maintain a healthy temperature.” 

Once that began Peter’s lip quivered. He became aware immediately of the cool sensation within him. His body began to shake uncontrollably. It was like his blood had been replaced with ice. 

“C-cold. It’s cold. Can I h-have a blanket?” Tony was tempted to remove his jacket and give it to him. The doctor turned his attention to Fury. “He should be experiencing hypothermia now, why is he still able to talk?”

Fury scoffed “Well he is enhanced. He hasn’t been studied under these conditions so there’s no way of telling how he’s going to react.”

“It’s f-freezing. M-make it s-stop. Please I wanna g-go  
h-home. I want May.” Once he said that Steve ducked beside Peter. He cleared his throat. Peter used what little energy he had left to turn and look at him. “You are a brilliant mind Peter. I know this is unfair. You don’t deserve this.” Tony realized that maybe comforting the kid would make this less horrifying. 

“Yeah, just think once this is over. You won’t feel anything anymore. No more disappointment, no growing old. You won’t have to deal with girls breaking your heart or ever having to pay a bill.” 

Unfortunately Tony’s words only made Peter cry. “I won’t g-grow up, I won’t ever graduate o-or even have my first kiss. I was going to w-work my way through c-college. It’s cold, it’s really cold. I can’t close my eyes. It’s too cold for that.”

“We are going to start the electric impulses now.”

Peter looked at the doctor with tears streaming down his face. 

“D-don’t please.”

Once the first shock hit him. Peter began wheezing. His body trying to reject the trauma. The second shock hit and Peter was coughing. By the third he began to sob “I can’t breathe. I can’t breathe. Get it out! I want it out. Get it out-” 

While one nurse was observing the X-ray the other nurse began to pet Peter’s hair shushing him. “Shhh it’s okay. Close your eyes.”

Peter’s hand was opening and closing. He wanted it to be held. He didn’t know why but he did. Tony caught on and held his cold hand. Peter squeezed it immediately.

“Don’t fight anymore.” 

Peter wanted so badly to fight but the fourth shock took that out of him. His eyes fluttered closed. The noise of the flatline had made Steve glare at Fury with disgust. Tony could feel Peter’s hand uncurl. 

The doctor was first to speak “I’d like to begin the dissection as soon as possible.”

Tony and Steve left the room. Tony drew in a shaky breath. “We going to get through this?”

Steve shook his head “No I mean he is dead. We helped make sure of that.”

Tony muttered “And we keep living anyway.”


End file.
